Welcome to the Blooming Mindset, a weekly dose of clarity, mindset, and practical wisdom to help you stay consistent, think more deeply, and build a life aligned with your identity and purpose. I’m Ruth Rieckehoff, and I’m so glad you’re here. Please share this newsletter with a friend!
Beloved Architect of Identity,
You ever have one of those moments where life humbles you… hard?
Mine happened in a tiny restroom in Kalambaka, Greece.
It’s funny now, but at the time, it was not.
Picture this: I’m fresh off my first international trip, feeling like a seasoned traveler. Confident. Capable. I didn’t need help. I knew what I was doing.
Until I didn’t.
On my second international trip, I had gone to use the restroom at a restaurant tucked inside an old building. Quaint. Charming. The kind of place with a skeleton key and doors that creak with centuries of history.
I finished up, went to unlock the door… and it wouldn’t budge.
I twisted. Pulled. Jiggled the knob. Nothing.
I was locked in.
Literally stuck. Sweating, panicking, banging on the door while a whole restaurant buzzed just outside, totally unaware.
And here’s the kicker…
This could’ve all been avoided.
Because on my very first trip to Europe, the professor organizing our group had shared a travel tip: “Always have a shadow. Be someone’s shadow, too.”
Translation? Travel in pairs. Look out for each other. Don’t go anywhere alone.
At first, I took it seriously. But by trip #2? I got a little overconfident.
I mean… I’d done this before. I had the passport stamps to prove it.
So I went to the restroom alone.
And found myself locked in a heatbox of a bathroom in a foreign country with a stubborn 1800s door and no one to help, until my sister realized I was taking too long.
She found someone. They passed me a skeleton key under the door.
I got out.
Shaken. Drenched in sweat. Heart pounding.
But free.
And the message hit me, loud and clear:
Doing things alone might feel powerful… but it’s not always wise.
We live in a world that praises independence. Hustle. Self-reliance.
“Strong people don’t need help.”
“You’ve got this, just push harder.”
“Depend on no one.”
Sound familiar?
That mindset works, until it doesn’t.
Until you’re stuck.
Not in a restroom… but in your goals. In your business. In your personal growth.
Trying to do it all. Figure it all out. Carry it all on your own.
And wondering why it feels so heavy.
Let me say this clearly:
You don’t have to do it alone.
Sometimes, having a “shadow,” someone to check on you, cheer for you, or simply notice when you’re missing, makes all the difference.
It’s not weakness. It’s wisdom.
So here’s my message for you today:
Ask for help.
Lean on others.
Build your support system.
Because sometimes, no matter how smart, capable, or experienced you are… the door just won’t open from the inside.
And that’s okay.
What matters is having someone on the outside who knows you’re in there and is willing to slide you the key.
Who’s that person for you?
And more importantly, who are you showing up for in return?
Cheering for your next breakthrough (and hoping it’s not in a bathroom).
Until next week! Keep blooming!
Ruth
Reflect
- Who in your life would notice if you were “missing” for too long: mentally, emotionally, or physically?
- Where are you pretending to be self-sufficient when you really need someone to check in?
Reframe
Old belief: “I’m strong because I handle things alone.”
New belief: “I’m strong because I know when to ask for support.”
Real strength isn’t isolation. It’s knowing how to build safety nets before you fall.
Actionable Transformation
- Identify your “shadows”: 1–3 people you trust to look out for you. Let them know they matter.
- Set up one accountability touchpoint this week: daily check-in, weekly call, or even just a shared note.
- Offer to be someone else’s shadow. Support is a two-way street, and it deepens when it’s mutual.
P.S. If you’ve been trying to hit that next level in your growth alone, and it feels like you’re pushing a locked door, follow me on X. I help creators, doers, and builders with mindset shifting while working towards genuine, purpose-driven endeavours. Please feel free to contact me if you need assistance in developing a support system.
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